Are you kidding me? Like I don’t keep myself clean enough!
So the humans went out today for a while, and when they came back, they brought me a tasty new block to chew on. I came out to inspect the apartment for a while (as usual) and then I noticed my pink towel was [...]

I promised a long time ago that I’d eventually write about the playpen that my humans constructed for me; now’s a good time as any. I’ve been very busy lately with other household chores, like helping my Girl Human clean by climbing onto the vaccuum machine and playing with my Boy Human. I have [...]

I’ve lately been running circles around my girlfriend. Have I ever posted about her? She’s pink and so extremely soft, and my humans introduced us when they got my new condo. She’s sweet. She doesn’t do much around the house, and I have to put her inside my food bowl to get her to eat, [...]

I know it has been a while since I last updated. My people have put me on a new diet - all greens and oranges for me! They also put me on new pellets which I like a lot more than the last ones, though I really appreciate the fresh foods even more. It was [...]

Last Wednesday I had what my Humans condescendingly refer to as a “play” date. They put me into this very small housing unit (which was, unsurprisingly, very uncomfortable and stressful for me) and when I came out I was in a different world. It was strangely familiar, as if I’d been there before - [...]

In the living room, there’s a big green chair which my Girl Human likes to sit on while I’m out of the cage. Sometimes she lets me sit on her legs, but she never lets me climb over her computer and give my input in her emails and message boards, and she never lets me [...]

I believe I’ve figured out the proper relations with my humans.
Boy Human likes to play a lot. Sometimes I get tired of running around the house, but I fear that he’ll get restless if I don’t keep up the games. He runs back and forth between the hallway and the kitchen and I follow; sometimes [...]

Yesterday I spent a lot of quality time with my humans allowing them to get used to my presence. Eventually I hope they’ll trust me enough to let me go wherever I please, but until then I guess I’ll just have to play by their rules. They’re fussy creatures, humans, always worrying about one thing [...]